I was making coffee in my tiny kitchen when my phone buzzed – it was Lisa, my college friend who moved to Toronto five years ago. ‘Did you catch Zhang Haochen’s live stream yesterday?’ she asked, her voice tinged with that particular mix of excitement and frustration I’ve come to recognize. ‘I spent 40 minutes trying to get the QQ Music stream to work before giving up.’
That familiar sinking feeling hit me – the one where you realize yet another piece of home is just out of reach for friends abroad. Lisa used to be the one who introduced me to Zhang Haochen’s writing back in university. We’d sit in the campus café, sharing earphones while reading his essays, the smell of cheap coffee and old books wrapping around us like a warm blanket.
The event she missed was genuinely special. On September 19th, from 5:30 to 7:00 PM, Zhang Haochen didn’t just launch his new book ‘Wait Until Spring’ – he created this intimate space where 3,000+ fans gathered virtually. What struck me was how raw he was about his creative process. ‘You know that feeling when you’re writing at 3 AM,’ he shared, ‘and the only sound is your keyboard clicking while the city sleeps? That’s when the real conversations happen.’
He talked about pressure in a way that made me look up from my phone. Not the generic ‘everyone has stress’ talk, but specific moments – like the time he stared at a blank document for six hours, the cursor blinking like a silent accusation. Then he played the title track ‘Wait Until Spring,’ his voice cracking slightly on the line about ‘winter always feeling longer when you’re waiting alone.’ I actually had to pause the stream for a minute because wow.
What kills me is that Lisa would have loved every second of this. She’s the one who first told me about Zhang’s unique ability to find poetry in ordinary moments. Now she’s stuck watching grainy screen recordings I sent her, the audio slightly distorted, missing the real-time comments flooding in from other fans saying things like ‘this song healed my Wednesday.’
It’s not just about missing one event though – it’s the accumulation. The Lunar New Year galas that buffer endlessly, the dramas that show ‘content not available in your region,’ the music that stops halfway through. Each one feels like another thread connecting them to home being cut.
After we hung up, I scrolled through the event hashtag #等春天再说吧#. One comment stuck with me: ‘张皓宸 said spring will come when we’re ready to bloom – but what if we can’t even get to the garden?’ Funny how a metaphor about waiting can feel so literal when you’re oceans away.
So to Lisa and all the overseas friends missing these moments – I see you. I’ll keep sending those imperfect screen recordings, and maybe one day soon, we’ll figure out how to bring the garden to you.
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PC：
mobile：
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